‘I’ll go to jail before I shut my mouth’

DiPaolo is thrilled to be coming to New Hampshire to get back on stage and perform, which is something he’s not able to do as often as he would like to due to the demands of his radio show. Let’s just hope the New Hampshire crowd has a little more knowledge on how to conduct themselves during a comedy show, unlike some at one of Nick’s previous Boston appearances.

A few years ago I was at the Comedy Connection in Boston, true story – kid sitting in the front row, his cell phone goes off, he answers it and starts talking. I go, ‘Hey, dude, hang up the phone!’ and he’s like, ‘Whatever.’ He hangs up, and like five minutes later, it rings again – and he starts talking again! And I go, ‘What the f**k are you doing, man?’ and he was, like, incredulous!” DiPaolo tells the BCSE. “So I go (and this is true), ‘Hey what kind of a phone is that? Is that the Verizon [it was the latest phone]? My wife wants to get me one of those, let me see that.’ He hands it to me, I bring it over – I had a glass of Diet Coke, I dropped his phone right in the diet coke. 

People still talk about the Wizard of Oz joke (NSFW):

Don’t cry — everybody’s still talking. (Except to Garaffalo, the cunt.)

PS: It takes most comics a long time to write a new 20 minutes. What did LL do after that she stopped screwing black guys and eating like a pig?

And her husband has gotten a lot better looking than she is now. Doesn’t bode well.

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