Posts Tagged ‘:entry:fivefeet-2009-11-04-0006’

Bullet bras are back! I love being ahead of the, er, curve

bullet bra

I’ve been wearing one for years. Nice to see other people catching up with me.

Too bad none of the “bullet bras” pictures aren’t really bullet bras.

To get the authentic effect, your bra either needs to be based on authentic period patterns, or needs a “cross your heart” “lift and separate” construct at the front, and none of those pictured in the news story are/do.

Those are just chicks with big boobs wearing regular old lady bras instead of the Victoria’s Secret push up “cleavage bras” that have been the default style for 10 or 15 years.

Besides giving you that chubby “shelf o’ boobs” effect that looks like you could arrange Red Rose Tea porcelain figurines on somebody’s chest, Victoria’s Secret bras are never the same after you wash them, no matter how careful you are. Rip off. If you need a non-bullet bra, Frederick’s of Hollywood makes are actually easier to care for, and usually cheaper.

With the bullet look, you do not get, or want, what most people call “cleavage”, which is literal misnomer. “Boobs pushed together” is the exact opposite of what the word “cleavage” means, that is: “to split apart.” Am I the only person who owns a frickin’ dictionary?