If LA wants to clean itself up, they should wait for all 30,000 people to show up [at Michael Jackson’s memorial service] and then just lock the doors. It’s not gonna be the team behind the Large Hadron Collider.
It’s gonna be Billy Bush and Mary Hart and Joe Jackson and 800 lawyers and an army of delusional retards who the only thing they had to take time off from was clogging up 911 with calls about “that bitch is crazy, you needa arrest her ass.”
They should lock the doors, and then it turns out [the fans had] actually climbed aboard a rocket.
And then just shoot that thing right into the Sun.