I called Ron Paul the GOP equivalent of the hot crazy chick every guy is tempted to f**k just this once, and Mitt Romney the Republican’s “moped.”
Now Theo Caldwell argues for Newt Gingrich as high class hooker — although not in those words.
Romney is the Republican Al Gore: humorless, awkward, the son of a successful politician who can fill out phenomenal suits but never seems quite comfortable in his own skin. (…)
Newt actually is brilliant, unlike Obama, whose genius is uncritically attested to by those who have heard it spoken of, or who choose not to contest the point for fear of being called racist. Indeed, Obama’s brilliance is much like global warming: Its existence is insisted upon by nasty people who stand ready to condemn you in the worst possible terms if you hesitate to agree. (…)
If he can enact even a portion of his policy proposals – repeal Obamacare, create a 15 percent optional flat tax, reduce corporate rates to 12.5 percent, eliminate taxes on capital gains, dividends and death – President Gingrich will serve America well.
But not long thereafter, it will be time for him to go.
Remember: you don’t pay them (just) for sex — you pay them to leave.