May further defended the plans by barking the new government slogan ‘Paedo 9/11’ in response to questions and has commissioned a children’s cartoon where ‘Blinky’ the security eye helps people find lost car keys in a bid to make it less terrifying.
May added: “It’s a well known fact that anybody planning to do something unspeakable, either with a bomb or their own penis, will chat about it at length with lots of other people using their own home computer and phone.
ALSO? I don’t get it, either:
According to the Institute for Studies the average Bank Holiday mini-break offers eight hours of enjoyment, compared to 19 hours of being in a stationary vehicle.
Professor Henry Brubaker said: “During the four-day Easter break millions of humans will all head to the same destinations in a bid to get away from each other.