I made a fool of myself in a greeting card store by laughing so hard at a “Deep Thoughts” card that I started crying and had to leave in shame.
It was probably this one:
“Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he’s carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he’s carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. Also, you’re drunk.”
I used this one as an epigraph for one of my Catholic Register columns, and Arnie and I still say “cuz that’s what you’re getting” around the house a few times a week:
“If God dwells inside us like some people say, I sure hope He likes enchiladas, because that’s what He’s getting”
Anyway, this guy found the perfect “Deep Thoughts” for the Brian Williams mess:
I guess I kinda lost control, because in the middle of the play I ran up and lit the evil puppet villain on fire. No, I didn’t. Just kidding. I just said that to help illustrate one of the human emotions, which is freaking out. Another emotion is greed, as when you kill someone for money, or something like that. Another emotion is generosity, as when you pay someone double what he paid for his stupid puppet.