I laughed out loud.
Well done, Daily Mash:
The Sex Pistols’ affiliation with a series of new Virgin credit cards has sparked outrage from dairy enthusiasts across the globe.
“Butter is supposed to be about sticking two fingers up to the ‘establishment’, and screaming ‘Fuck you!’ to toast. I just can’t believe that the same young firebrand who used to yell ‘I love the taste on me crumpets!’ has become a pathetic corporate shill.
“I took the tub of Country Life out of my fridge and burned it in the garden. It made a weird smell.”
Cultural critic Emma Bradford said: “Back in the seventies, butter was a way for disenfranchised working class kids to express their frustration with lard, dripping and other fat-based types of spread. They wanted a more flavoursome breakfast even if it meant smashing up farmyards.”